How to: Defeat telemarketers
Katie Judd
Issue date: 11/6/06 Section: Features
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It's that time of year again when the holidays are rolling around and advertising for early bird shoppers has started its usual "buy here save more". Even telemarketers are starting to call cell phones, not to mention some still call the house even though theres the do not call list.
So with all the holiday buzz starting with Thanksgiving around the corner and Christmas soon to follow. Here are some top ten things to say or do (according to joek.com) of how to get rid of, or maybe entertain the telemarketer on the other line.
1. "I'm sorry, but I'm really busy right now. Give me your home number and I'll call you back later tonight."
2. "Shhhh. Wait a minute. I'm here robbing the house. Whoa! I think the owners just got home. Can you hold?
3. When some asks how you are: "Well, I'm having an existential crisis at the moment. Let me explain..."
4. "You want to sell me insurance? I've been trying to get insurance for years, but nobody will sell me any!"
5. To a phone company solicitor: "That sounds great! Wait, can you hold for a minute?" Leave the phone off the hook until he or she hangs up.
6. When a chimney sweep or rug cleaner calls, break into tears and sob, "Is this some kind of a joke? My house burned down last night. We lost everything!"
7. Learn show tunes. Anything by Ethel Merman tends to be the most effective.
8. If the person says he's Joe Doe from XYZ Company, ask him to spell his name, ask him to spell the company name, then ask where it is located. Continue to ask personal questions or questions about the company for as long as necessary.
9. Crying out, in well-simulated tones of surprise, "Judy! Is this really you, I can't believe it! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few moments of terror as she tries to figure out how the heck she could know you.
10. Say, "No" over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each no, and keep an even tempo even as they're trying to speak. This is the most fun if you can keep going until they hang up.
With all these fun ways to entertain yourself with telemarketers there is a way to get your cell phone number on the do not call list, heres how according to ehow.com.
1.Go to DoNotCall.gov and register you home and mobile phone numbers for free in the National Do Not Call Registry.
2. Find and register for your state's "do not call" list.
3. Get an unlisted phone number. In some states, it is against the law to place sales calls to non published numbers. Also, telemarketers often use the telephone book to construct their calling lists.
So with all the holiday buzz starting with Thanksgiving around the corner and Christmas soon to follow. Here are some top ten things to say or do (according to joek.com) of how to get rid of, or maybe entertain the telemarketer on the other line.
1. "I'm sorry, but I'm really busy right now. Give me your home number and I'll call you back later tonight."
2. "Shhhh. Wait a minute. I'm here robbing the house. Whoa! I think the owners just got home. Can you hold?
3. When some asks how you are: "Well, I'm having an existential crisis at the moment. Let me explain..."
4. "You want to sell me insurance? I've been trying to get insurance for years, but nobody will sell me any!"
5. To a phone company solicitor: "That sounds great! Wait, can you hold for a minute?" Leave the phone off the hook until he or she hangs up.
6. When a chimney sweep or rug cleaner calls, break into tears and sob, "Is this some kind of a joke? My house burned down last night. We lost everything!"
7. Learn show tunes. Anything by Ethel Merman tends to be the most effective.
8. If the person says he's Joe Doe from XYZ Company, ask him to spell his name, ask him to spell the company name, then ask where it is located. Continue to ask personal questions or questions about the company for as long as necessary.
9. Crying out, in well-simulated tones of surprise, "Judy! Is this really you, I can't believe it! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few moments of terror as she tries to figure out how the heck she could know you.
10. Say, "No" over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each no, and keep an even tempo even as they're trying to speak. This is the most fun if you can keep going until they hang up.
With all these fun ways to entertain yourself with telemarketers there is a way to get your cell phone number on the do not call list, heres how according to ehow.com.
1.Go to DoNotCall.gov and register you home and mobile phone numbers for free in the National Do Not Call Registry.
2. Find and register for your state's "do not call" list.
3. Get an unlisted phone number. In some states, it is against the law to place sales calls to non published numbers. Also, telemarketers often use the telephone book to construct their calling lists.
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